a nostalgic melody

Went to Mannes College of Music today to accompany my brothers on their auditions. They auditioned for the prep division for playing violin. It was an interesting feeling to go to Mannes...the only times I've been there was to visit my friends Sho or Jon, which I had started doing since throughout high school. And now it's come time for my brothers to be making that step themselves and developing their skills as musicians.

It was a little bittersweet, because I never really got to take violin seriously. I started up lessons late in middle school, and the only reason I started in the first place was because I just wanted to learn to play for fun. But my instructor was insistent on pushing me...my first year of playing violin, I already took a Level 5 NYSSMA exam and was learning to play a Level 6 piece. I was playing pieces way beyond my skill level, and was relying more on piano skills to play violin. I could play fast pieces, but it was hard for me to play slow and emotional pieces because I never learned how to vibrato! I kind of wish I started earlier and was able to develop more. My orchestra teacher always commented to me how she wished she could "turn me into a violinist" but I got so sick of being pushed so hard that I just stopped enjoying it.

Nowadays, I barely touch my violin but I still play piano. I feel like piano will always be a part of me; I don't care if I'm not the best or whatnot. In middle school to high school, there were 3 years where I didn't take lessons and it felt so weird, like something was missing. Even in college, even though I don't have lessons as often as I should, I still love the feeling of playing and challenging myself to do better.

At Mannes, chilling at the Steinway piano in the practice room~